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Saturday, June 21, 2008

It's a Sad, Sad World

Well, I just read a recent article about a group of teenage girls in a town in Massachusetts who made a pact with each other to get pregnant this year. They are all 16 or younger. When one of them gets pregnant they high-five each other and if one doesn't then they are disappointed.

The word that came to my mind first was: sadness. Plain old sadness. After that was: stupidity, immaturity, scariness, responsibility, grace.

I am almost 24 years old. I will be married 2 years in August, I have been graduated from high school for 6 years, I have lived on my own and given myself the chance to experience life. I can't imagine how different my life would be if I had a child at 15 or 16...I would have a kid almost 10 years old. I can't even imagine having a child right now! When I was 15 I was still hooked on the Backstreet Boys. I had posters of bands all over my room, I still got punished for disobeying my parents, I had a curfew, I whined about having to empty the dishwasher and got mad if I couldn't do something with a friend unless all my homework was done. There was no time I ever thought "I think having a baby would be a great addition to my life right now." I couldn't even handle my own changing hormones, life and mind. There is SO MUCH going on inside you that I can't even imagine how purposefully bringing a child into that environment would be a "great idea."

My dearest friend had a baby when she was 17. It was not planned. She was strong and wise to give it up for adoption. I believe that she would have made a wonderful mother, and I am not doubting that those girls will. The issue is this: no matter what age you have a child at you have to be prepared for it to CHANGE YOUR LIFE! Literally overnight. Whether you give it up for adoption or keep your baby and raise it yourself, it will alter your existence. It's not like a dog where you can train it to stay in a crate when you leave for a few hours. Every day of your life will involve this child. They need patience, attention, direction, discipline, love, TIME...they will consume you.

I'm guessing that a 15 year old mother doesn't have the money to leave the baby with a sitter all day or even for a weekend. That is when the child also becomes the responsibility of those around them. One of the girls apparently said "Oh, I think my parents would be fine with it and they would help me." If I had been in this situation and my parents found out that I had said that they would be furious! From the start, before she is even pregnant, she is laying at least half of the responsibility on her parents. Since she will most likely (well, hopefully) be in school after the baby is born her parents will probably be the ones looking after it. Also, what about weekends? What about getting together with friends after school or on weekends? Does she think that when she and her friends go to a coffee shop with all their babies they will look cool and mature? They won't. They will look way too young to have children and people will know it.

It's a sad fact but, people will judge them. I admit that I have been guilty of it myself. I don't believe that it's right because we never really know what the circumstance is for someone. All I wish is that the person will experience some grace in their life. If these girls are choosing to walk a hard road, then I hope that there will be at least one person in their life that will show them God's grace. Because Lord knows I have needed it at times in my life.

Anywho, I just needed to rant a little about all of this. Issues like this hit deep down inside me and I need to share my feelings and my opinions. I hope that these girls find deep satisfaction outside of having children and that their lives are full and complete no matter what they choose to do.