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Thursday, January 28, 2010

One of Those Days

Do you ever have those self deprecating days? You just tear yourself up and down? Feel sorry for yourself and all the things you think you can't accomplish?

I had one of those days.

I joined sparkpeople.com last week and I have been so excited about it! It is really easy to follow. Every day I put everything I've eaten into the Nutrition Tracker and it lets me know if I'm in my allotted range for calories, fat, carbs, and protein. When you start you make a goal for yourself (how much you want to lose in whatever length of time you want.) Mine is 50 lbs in a year.

Well, I think I need to crunch that. I've been working really hard and staying within my ranges and I'm not dropping the pounds like I thought I would. It is so deflating and disappointing when you're working so hard at something and barely seeing a difference. I haven't even been craving sweet things or even things that are bad for me but today I caved. It wasn't out of cravings but just out of feeling sorry for myself. That is worse, in my opinion. I ended up having a big cookie, mashed potatoes and ice cream with fudge sauce (not all at once...lol.) I'm not very pleased with myself.

What I have realized in all this is I think I need to shorten my goal of a year to, say, 8 months. That whay my calorie range will be less and I will definitely see a difference. I'm sick of feeling helpless in all of this and I NEED to make a change - one that lasts for life.

So here goes my first honest weigh in:
January 28/10 - 261 lbs

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